Belhaven Scottish Ale

5.2% ABV from a nitrocan

I have a bit of a feud with nitrocans. Years ago, during my Guinness phase, I was invited to a party thrown by some older, classier folks, and I decided to bring two four-packs of Guinness nitrocans (this being a “classy” party I didn’t think a 30 rack of Milwaukee’s Best would be appropriate). Setting them down I suppose a bit too rough on the host’s kitchen counter, the (I say defective) widgets somehow managed to combust and the highly pressurized cans exploded. It was like when Vincent Vega accidentally shot Marvin in the head while he sat in the back of the 1974 Chevrolet Nova, blood and bone fragments flying everywhere, even landing in Jules Winnfield’s jheri curl. However, in my case, the exploding cans shot viscous brown stout beer in every direction, hitting party guests and landing in every single nook and cranny of the small kitchen. I didn’t need a Winston Wolf in my life to know what I had to do next. I thus spent the first hour of the party on my hands and knees scrubbing and standing on a small step ladder trying to sponge the Guinness from the ceiling. It was absolutely humiliating. I wrote Guinness a letter hoping to score some free shit, and, in fairness, their quality control guy did call me, but it was too much of a rigamarole to fill out all the paperwork and mail in the defective cans for laboratory analysis. Not worth it.

Now you see why I try to avoid nitrocans. However, my friend cites Belhaven as his absolute favorite beer and so I had to give it a whirl. Glad I did. Nutty, malty, smooth and creamy. Like a more flavorful Guinness. Goes down like Yoo-Hoo. I would definitely have this again.



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