Leinenkugel’s Honey Weiss

4.9% ABV

You pressed your luck, Leinenkugel. Or, rather, maybe I pressed my luck with the brewery. Just ten minutes ago I’m raving about their Berry Weiss and I should have just called it a beer-drinkin’ night. But, nope, had to go roll the multisided die and press my luck. Oh, and what should my roll get me but another terrible beer. Firstly, let me state that I can’t get the goddamn taste of the Berry Weiss out of my mouth. It’s not a bad taste or anything–in fact, I kinda enjoy it–but it feels like I licked on a few Blow Pops in the last hour and now I have a purple tongue and will have a sweet taste in my mouth for the rest of the evening. And, no, I haven’t checked the mirror to actually see if the Berry Weiss gave me the first purple tongue in beer-guzzling history, but it amuses me to think that I currently have one. Any how, I tried my best to get the berry taste out of my mouth so as to not taint my tasting and appreciation of the Honey Weiss, but it didn’t matter, it’s terribleness penetrated through the sweetness film over top my taste buds, hitting them like a battering ram breaking down a crack den’s door.

This is a real crummy beer. I don’t taste honey at all. It’s bitter and goes down harshly. I make a highly histrionic face every single time I take a sip of this beer. If I was actually with someone while drinking it, they would see my repulsed reaction to each sip and be like, “Come on! It can’t taste that bad! Stop overacting.” “Oh yeah, motherfucker, then you give it a sip.” And then they would and immediately sprint to the bathroom like they’d just accidentally drank some curdled milk. It’s sour, it’s over-carbonated but not drinkable at all, and it singes my tongue. This beer taste like the first time your “wacky” friend tries to brew his own beer and this is the shit he gives you. All proud of his first beer, oh, and he’s even printed out labels for the brew on his HP laser printer. Even though the beer sucks you want to be kind to your bud so you finish the whole bottle. Well, I have no one to be kind to but I want to be drunk so I likewise finish this whole disaster of a drink. Having said that, I think this is the first beer to give me a hangover while I’m in the midst of drinking it.

The label says this is “brewed with real Wisconsin honey.” Remind me never to celebrate Rosh Hashanah in Milwaukee.



One Response to Leinenkugel’s Honey Weiss

  1. John says:

    Oh man, I remember buying this one time in college. Oh the bitter disappointment. Leinenkugel lost my business on any brew after selling me this atrocity.

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